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Trump Derangement Syndrome

6 most likely announcements from Trump on November 15

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President Trump is expected to make an important announcement from West Palm Beach, Florida Today.

As an insider and political veteran with savvy, know how and killer instincts I have narrowed down for you the most likely scenarios that Trump is about to announce: 

  1. He finally bought Greenland and is starting a new nation 

Applications to become a citizen of the nation to be called More American Greenland Annex will be made available Christmas day. I personally am 10000% in. 

  1. He is running for Speaker of the House 

To be honest I would endorse this for the chaos it would cause in the oh-so-sacred halls alone.

  1. He secretly funded Elon Musk’s Iron Man project and now has possession of the final product

Ultra Maga indeed.

  1. He and Melania have adopted Tom Brady 

Tom just needs a stable and loving family environment. Plus more people need to adopt older kids. Inspirational. 

  1. He is releasing the security footage of the Mar-a-lago raid and it shows Merrick Garland just binge watching Pretty Little Liars from Trump’s bedroom

The rest of the FBI team busily searched for any possible evidence they might be able to use to finally bring down President Trump but Merrick just needed a safe space for his program. Those girls have so many secrets! 

  1. He is going to reveal that we are actually all part of an elaborate social experiment and he’s been sent by the other side to see if we’re ready to be released to the real world

“The world you know is a lie.” Wouldn’t that be so great right about now?

Or I guess he might be announcing a bid for presidency but that seems like an outlier compared to the other six. I guess we’ll see. 

Good luck whichever way, President Trump!

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