5 Reasons Trump Is Right To Bring Back the Department of War

So President Trump wants to ditch the soft-sounding “Department of Defense” and bring back the old school “Department of War.” Honestly? He’s onto something. Here’s why:

1. Defense Sounds Like We’re Always Losing

“Defense” makes it seem like we’re hiding under the bleachers during dodgeball. “War” says: hand me the ball, I’m knocking people out.

2. History Proves It Worked

World War I. World War II. Two rings on the scoreboard. Guess what we were called back then? Yep—Department of War. Coincidence? I don’t think so.

3. War Gets Respect, Defense Gets Excuses

“Department of War” strikes fear into enemies. “Department of Defense” sounds like a bad Little League team that keeps dropping pop flies.

4. It’s More Honest

Let’s not kid ourselves. We’re not exactly just “defending.” We have bases in 80 countries. If this were purely defense, Guam wouldn’t be on military speed dial.

5. It’s Peak Trump Branding

He’s a marketing guy at heart. “War” is simple, strong, and impossible to misunderstand. You don’t need a Pentagon press release to get it.