OLYMPICS UPDATE: Team USA Is Ready To Fight – Free Press Fail
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The Conservative Critic

OLYMPICS UPDATE: Team USA Is Ready To Fight

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Some of Team USA’s strongest performances in the first few days of the Tokyo Olympics have been in the weapons and fight categories. We came through the pandemic and we’re ready to brawl. 

We’re going to break it down for you weapon by weapon, fight by fight. 

Choose your weapon: GUNS

In Olympic shooting, team USA outperformed its metrics across the board. Lt. Amber English took a surprise Gold medal in skeet shooting in her olympic debut. Not only did she nab the Gold but she beat an Olympic record hitting 56 out of 60 targets absolutely dominating her competitors. 

Vincent Hannock took home his third Gold medal in Olympic skeet shooting. Hannock is one of the most decorated shooters in the world and made a huge comeback this year after coming in 15th in the Rio Olympics. In Tokyo, Hannock also broke a record along with English hitting almost a perfect score of 59 out of 60 targets. 

In the 10m air-rifle, 20-year-old William Shaner took home the first ever American gold medal for the event. Shaner also became the youngest American man to win any rifle event at the Olympics. Shaner narrowly beat the silver medalist from China scoring only fractions of a point better. 

Lock and load, patriots. Lock and load. 

Choose your weapon: SWORDS

Lee Kiefer became the first American to win Olympic Gold in individual foil fencing. Narrowly beating a Russian athlete in the finals, Keifer is only the second woman in American history to win a Gold medal in any fencing competition. 

Keifer trained in her parents basement after losing access to her gym during the pandemic. 

Touche, commies. 

Choose your weapon: FISTS

Anastasija Zolotic suited up, black belt and all, to quite literally kick butt taking down her Russian competitor 25 – 17 for Olympic Gold. Zolotic held nothing back in an extremely lively final fight giving her a strong enough lead to play defense as the clock ran out and she became the champion.

Catch us outside, Putin. 

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