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The Conservative Critic

Is your Valentine’s Day movie list basic or brilliant?



It’s February 14 and love is in the air. This time of year is the time to dedicate to cozying up with enormous quantities of chocolate (and our loved ones I guess) and watching our favorite films. 

Personally, I am a sucker for romantic comedy or nice romantic period dramas. And I have a long list of favorites. But for Valentine’s Day I have a tradition to give love a little twist. Valentine’s Day is made more fun by steering into either really really bad movies that are perhaps so bad they come back around and are good again or choosing something intentionally outrageous and campy. Celebrate love by celebrating laughter I say. 

Here is a list of my favorite (and probably your favorite) rom-coms and my cheekier Valentines Day alternatives (or just watch both): 

Swap Pride and Prejudice with Pride and Prejudice and Zombies   

Both films are two of my absolute favorites. Pride and Prejudice and Zombies is the same story as Pride and Prejudice only with inserted story line and dialog relating to a zombie uprising. It’s extremely funny and clever (if you don’t make the mistake of taking it seriously) and is actually more enjoyable if viewers have seen or read the original Pride and Prejudice before watching the zombie adaptation. 

Swap You’ve Got Mail with Joe Versus The Volcano 

You’ve Got Mail is considered by filmies to be perhaps the greatest romantic comedy of all time competing only with When Harry Met Sally which won an academy award and also featured Meg Ryan. But if you’re looking for Tom and Meg – look not further than Joe Versus the Volcano their very first film together. Technically a rom-com, the bizarre movie follows a man on a journey to throw himself into a Volcano. Meg Ryan plays three characters for no reason. It’s a gem. 

Swap When Harry Met Sally with Silver Linings Playbook

If you like Academy Award quality rom-coms like the classic When Harry Met Sally then something a bit weirder to choose is the Academy Award darling Silver Linings Playbook. Both are romantic comedies about friends turned to lovers and both feature pretty iconic diner scenes. In the case of Silver Linings Playbook, the pair are dealing with serious mental health issues which brings a unique comedic quality to the story which can liven up a dusty Valentines Day tradition. 

Swap How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days with Fifty Shades: Freed

HEAR ME OUT: How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days is one of the more iconic in the rom-com category and is a well constructed farce which without question put Kate Hudson, the daughter of Hollywood veteran Goldie Hawn, on the map. Fifty Shades: Freed is definitely iconic and definitely a farce, though, the latter was definitely inadvertent. Like How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, the Fifty Shades franchise put Dakota Johnson, daughter of Hollywood veteran Melanie Griffith, on the map. Fifty Shades: Freed is the final and worst installment of the franchise and probably one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen. However, it’s so bad that it definitely comes back around extremely funny. The plot line makes little to no sense and there is a very weird series of escalations which seem to have no relationship to one another. The film delivers some of my most favorite moments of dialog in all of film history including this line delivered by Jamie Dornan which I quote constantly: “I had a dream….that you were dead.” He also randomly starts singing Paul McCartney’s “Maybe I’m Amazed” for no reason in the middle of the film. Gold.

Swap The Notebook with Shrek 2

Shrek 2 has all the romance and star-crossed love of The Notebook but it’s 10 times more fun, a musical number at the end, and a body positive message. Swap “if you’re a bird, I’m a bird.” with “If you’re an ogre, I’m an ogre.” and you’ve got yourself a great Valentine’s Day screening. 

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