Is Life of a Showgirl about Donald J. Trump? 

Taylor Swift’s newest album, Life of a Showgirl, isn’t about Blake Lively or Travis Kelce. Its obviously about President Donald J. Trump and his allies. There are plenty of clues not least of which is that she has repeatedly dropped the number “47” in somel of her easter egg viral marketing campaigns. The color scheme is primarily orange? I mean come on. This play is about us! But in a good way.

Below see a track by track breakdown of each song on The Life of Ophelia and which member of the Trump alliance it’s actually about. 

“Fate of Ophelia” is Donald J. Trump

“The Fate of Ophelia” is a song about someone saving someone else from drowning. Clearly, this is about Donald J. Trump saving America from the horrors of the Biden Administration. Not to mention the fact that “Fate of Ophelia” is the lead song for the album and all the marketing and merchandising has been ORANGE. Coincidence? No. 

“Elizabeth Taylor” is Marco Rubio

Marco Rubio has as many jobs as Elizabeth Taylor had husbands. And the song says “Been number one, but I’ve never had two.” Which of course is referring to Marco Rubio having way more than two jobs. 

“Opalite” is Pete Hegseth

“Opalite” features lyrics “I had a bad habit, of missing lovers past, my brother used to call it, eating out of the trash, It’s never gonna last” and that is obviously a coded message about eating better so there are no fat generals. Then also “And all of the foes and all of the friends, have seen it before, they’ll see it again” is obviously about the many wars of the United States of America. Obviously. 

“Father Figure” is Susie Wiles

“Father Figure” is a mafia style song about “protecting the family” and not crossing the wrong person. White House Chief of Staff Susie Wiles is the godfather of the Trump Administration. She protects the family. Leave it with her. 

“Eldest Daughter” Donald Trump Jr.

“Eldest Daughter” is the perfect fit for the eldest son of President Trump. The song is also about the weight of the loyalty an oldest sibling has for their whole family including their parents which suits DJTJ perfectly. And really, DJT isn’t a “bad b*tch” or “savage” wither. 

“Ruin the Friendship” is a respectful pass

This song is about a friend of Taylor Swift’s who died young and for that reason we won’t be making any comparisons even in good fun. 

“Actually Romantic” is RFK 

“Actually Romantic” is about how it’s actually a compliment to have such obsessed haters. If anyone in the Trump admin has truly besotted haters, its RFK. And it clearly only fuels him. 

Wi$h Li$st: Matt Walsh

Matt Walsh isn’t in the administration but the song is about how being married and having kids that look like your husband in a suburban setting is the ideal perfect life. I feel like its plausible Matt Walsh actually wrote the song. “Boss up, settle down.” 

Wood: J.D. Vance

“Wood” is a double entendre about large ‘trees’ and I’m just guessing. 

CANCELLED!: Donald J. Trump

“CANCELLED!” is about someone who society criticizes and who likes their friends “cancelled.” Obviously, this perfectly describes the most cancelled population in the country – MAGA Americans. Further, the way “CANCELLED!” is spelling in all caps with the exclamation mark just screams Donald J. Trump tweet and also the song directly quotes Candace Owens re: “did you girl boss too close to the sun?”

“Honey” is Keir Starmer 

The British Prime Minister rolled out the most elaborate red carpet in the history of Britain’s relationship with the United States in partnership with the Royal family when he invited President Trump for an official state visit to Windsor. Prime Minister Starmer then gave a very glowing speech about how great President Trump is – all in hopes of getting a better trade deal. 

The song “Honey” is how being called “honey” was always snide and patronizing until “he” said it. In this case he is Trump and Starmer likes him to call him “honey.” 

The Life of a Show Girl: Donald J. Trump

“The Life of a Showgirl” is obviously about Donald J. Trump himself. The lyrics say: “They gave her the keys to the city, then said she didn’t do it legitly.” and then the hook is “You don’t know the life of a show girl and you’re never gonna wanna.” The song also appears to sample or share strong similarities with the score of the film The Greatest Showman. There is no greater political showman than President Donald J. Trump. He knows how to razzle dazzle em. He knows what it takes.