It’s May 4th which is unofficial Star Wars day (May the Fourth be with you!). Last year Free Press Fail told you which Star Wars characters the Biden admin were (these still hold up). This year we’re going to take a sunnier turn and look at the good guys.
Here is who I think your favorite politicos are in the Star Wars universe.
- President Donald Trump is for sure Han Solo
Us: “We love you.”
Him: “I know.”
Donald Trump is THE rogue of politics. The left and the elite will do anything to keep him down but they just can’t seem to do it. He speaks his mind with a sharp wit and sense of humor and he knows just how good he is. America is his Millennium Falcon and we are all his Chewy.
- Kari Lake is Princess Leia
Tell me you don’t think Kari would call someone a “nerf herder.”
Princess Leia and Kari Lake both tell it exactly like they see it. You can’t get anything past either of them and you wouldn’t even dare try to push them around. They’re both leaders of a resistance and charismatic champions of their causes. The force is with them both.
- Tucker Carlson is Obi Wan Kenobi
Tucker Carlson has been on a years-long journey uncovering the gravity of the evil infiltrating our society. Like Obi Wan, he was blind sided by the betrayal of the very ally who he most empowered. Obi Wan is the true north of the Star Wars franchise as is Tucker Carlson to the conservative movement. He seeks balance. He seeks truth.
- Rush Limbaugh is Qui-Gon Jinn
Rush Limbaugh is the ultimate authority. Without Rush there would have been no conservative media at all. He was the OG arbiter of free speech. Even though he’s gone, his spirit lives on in our free speech fighters today just like Qui-Gon through the force for Obi Wan and all the jedi after.
- Tulsi Gabbard is Ahsoka Tano
Ahsoka is neither on the dark or light side of the force much like Tulsi’s independent political status. The two women both walk a fine line between worlds but find their commitment to balance and good to draw them more toward one side than the other. Ahsoka is a tough fighter and a solid ally. She may not lead the troops, but you want her on your side. I also strongly believe that if there was surfing in Star Wars, Ahsoka would be into it.
- Governor Sarah Huckabee Sanders is Rey
Gov. Huckabee Sanders is the future of the conservative movement. She will face a time when she has to choose between the dark and the light. The Bush’s and the people. But I think Sarah has the chops to choose right.
- Ben Shapiro is Poe Dameron
Ben Shapiro is definitely a good guy and he’s fighting for all the right things. He also for sure thinks he knows everything and is always right. And even though he’s right a lot, he’s not right all of the time. But just like Poe, at the end of the day he’s someone you’d follow into battle….or a Twitter argument.
- Ron DeSantis is Luke Skywalker
Ron DeSantis is young, inexperienced and a lot of people incorrectly believe he is the one to restore balance to the force…I mean country. Like Luke, he makes unforced errors due to lack of training and despite believing to be the chosen one, he takes a back seat to the star power of someone else (re: Donald “Han Solo” Trump). In the end, he’s still one of the good ones. For all his really annoying flaws, Luke is by-an-large a force of good and does come through in the end just like Ron is going to (hopefully). Especially once he listens to the masters.
- Elon is R2D2
Beep = Tweet.
I feel like Elon and R2 are the only ones who really know how to problem-solve. They get stuff done.