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Censorship Watch

10 New Names For Facebook

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As you probably know, Facebook is becoming more and more the leftist overlords of speech censorship in America. The company now owns a lion’s share of social media and connectivity platforms including Instagram, WhatsApp and more. Mark Zuckerberg, Facebook’s chief lizard king founder and CEO recently announced the company would be going through a rebrand to better incorporate their many faceted organization. 

So what should the new organization whose mission will be to keep everyone who thinks differently than the current lefitst elite off the internet and isolated from public discourse? 

I have some thoughts: 

  1. Ministry of Discourse

Let’s brand this Orwellian nightmare for what it really is. Plus plus ungood. 

  1. Puppet Master

Like Ticketmaster but for our thoughts.

  1. Zuck Suck

He invented it, it should have his name.

  1. Fight Club 

What happens on Facebook, stays on Facebook. Forever. And is reviewed by the NSA on a regular basis. 

  1. User Data Farmville

Like regular Farmville but Zuckerberg makes a million dollars off of you and you get nothing. 

  1. DIM: DNC Information Machine 

A platform for Democrats and Democratic ideas especially during campaign cycles.

  1. SafesSpace

Like MySpace but with nothing fun about it. 

  1. The Facebook 

Bring back the “the” no matter what Justin Timberlake says.

  1. Free Speech Monitor 

Monitoring speech to make sure it’s not the bad kind of free.

  1. Progressives Only

Like Adults Only but weirder kinks.

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